7.30.2007

10 Things I learned and am starting to miss about the big apple

1. My family will always be my number one source of strength... and sometimes those inevitable AAAAHHHH moments!
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2. Family doesnt always have to mean that you share the same last name.
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3. Work doesn't always hafto be about dragging yourself out of the house in order to survive... sometimes it can actually be something you enjoy! My gawd I miss these kids!
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4. We all (SHOULD? WOULD?) come to a point in life wherein we meet someone who actually survives off their own pocket, meaning no additional child support or emergency trust funds. And if it really is the right time, we are usually aaawwwed by such people... hence, making us work our asses of to be somewhat just like them.
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5. Kids can come from all parts of the world but we dont really have to speak one language in order to get them (or in order for them to get us!)
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6. NYC is the place to be...it's one of those cities that everyone should TRAVEL to... just for traveling... the living part, well you can as long as you think youll have the same enthusiasm for it as if youre still just TRAVELING.

7. Manhattan lifestyle is all being constantly in motion... think: snap, snap, snap while youre walking.
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8. City living is all about walking or atleast mastering the subway... and so! it is also a nice work out. You never realize youve been walking 10blocks already as you are constantly surprised of the happenings at central park.... and that's just the park!
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9. Winter is all about nice, photogenic sceneries of places covered in white snow or those OVERlayering winter outfits, but other than that.. that's about it! I still stand by what I say that fall is the best time in NY.

10. I miss that NY spunk... when youre there it's either you feel it within you or youre too annoyed that it just seems to be oozing off everyone next to you!
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photos aka: my last days at NYC

6.21.2007

I heart NY 04/06 - 06/07

The year went by fast...

This has been the theme of my day, suddenly everything just seems to be ending. I have been living at the big apple for quite a while now. I made it for a year! Well atleast a full school year minus my Christmas break... but then again I consider this an achievement. Who wouldve thought I would survive... this long? Well come to think of it I do know why, it was because of the children.

Our classes formally ended today, atleast my days with the children. It was a bittersweet goodbye as we all celebrated together with the parents, my Rainbow Room Community. It was very very comforting to be exchanging nice, nice words of the year that was. It was an opportunity for me to be able to work with such lovely children and the best of parents and families! It broke my heart that they all had to go. I know I will be crying tomorrow when I return the classroom (to clean up) minus the children. It will be very very sad and lonely. It was very comforting to get my last hugs and kisses from my kids. I miss them all already! And this is just my first year... how many more of this should I go through?

I have always, always hated goodbyes. Who loves them anyway right? For someone who seems to be living a nomadic life lately, I should have been used to this already. Not! The last-minute packing... I'm an expert already! The shopping rush for going away gifts or pasalubongs... I've mastered it! The check-in and airport procedures... gotten used to it! But the leaving, I just don't think I could live with that.

Will Smith's voice from Pursuit of Happiness has been following me all day now... This part of my life is called living, leaving...

Someone once sung, goodbyes are not forever... for sure! NYC Shopping, need I say more?

photo aka: My very photogenic snapshot of one of NY's icon while onboard the Hudson River cruise. I'll see you liberty!

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6.06.2007

Nephew # 13

Just recently I posted about Kuya Carlo's wedding. My infamous overprotective kuya! And now... ta-da!!!

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Here comes baby Andrew Curtis Guevarra. Our eldest kuya now has the youngest apo/pamangkin in the family. Well atleast with Barangay Guevarra.

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On June 3, morning time here and night time there, my text-forwarding family started to monitor Kuya Carlo's and Ate Rette's trip to the hospital. Now, with a family as big as ours, a delivery is just not that scary anymore. Well it's nothing new and it's always that one good trip to the hospital... so we were relaxed. On the other hand, I think Kuya was (as always) being obessessively compulsively exaggerating about everything. But! We don't blame him. It's the first baby. As for us, well we probably just believed that baby Curtis will wait for lola.

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Now with lola still on vaca (lagot ka mommy!), we now convince ourselves he's just as cute in the picture. Ang cuuuuuttteee cutteeee!!! With the proud dad's gazillion pictures with matching narrative captioning, I just can't decide yet which is my fave. I CANT WAIT TO SEE THE BABY.

Kuya texted me this morning, 4pm their time so thank you very much for waking me up with a vibrating pillow. And with a cranky but informative exchange of text messages, eto lang nasagot ko in the end... OO NA NGA, UUWI NA KO!

photo aka: Still bragging about family

6.04.2007

Ang Matalinhagang Combo na Maroon 5

Had spare time (like always!) to listen intently to the new Maroon 5 album. Hands down... ish soo good! It's a rollercoaster ride to a relationship drama... or maybe just my own dramas?

Basta... most of the songs I feel like hitting my head, no make that BANG my head on the wall. Sobrang patama naman! Aray. As in tumatagos!

Can't really decide yet which is my fave, I thought their latest release was really a good one. But nope! There's even better...a lot more better! Aray, naririnig ko ule... masakit talaga!

Here's one:

*I really dont want to attract negative vibes with this. Title na title palang ansama na. Parang soo pessimistic and I know it's too early for that! So not me... Pero ba't ganon.*

Nothing Lasts Forever

It is so easy to see
Dysfunction between you and me
We must free up these tired souls
Before the sadness kills us both

I tried and tried to let you know
I love you but I'm letting go
It may not last but I don't know
Just don't know

If you don't know
Then you can't care
And you show up
But you're not there
But I'm waiting
And you want to
Still afraid that I will desert you

Everyday
With every worthless word we get more far away
The distance between us makes it so hard to stay
But nothing lasts forever, but be honest babe
It hurts but it may be the only way

A bed that's warm with memories
Can heal us temporarily
The misbehaving only makes
The ditch between us so damn deep

Built a wall around my heart
I’ll never let it fall apart
But strangely I wish secretly
It would fall down while I'm asleep
[Nothing Lasts Forever lyrics on http://www.metrolyrics.com]

If you don't know
Then you can't care
And you show up
But you're not there
But I'm waiting
And you want to
Still afraid that I will desert you, babe

Everyday
With every worthless word we get more far away
The distance between us makes it so hard to stay
But nothing lasts forever, but be honest babe
It hurts but it may be the only way

Tough we have not hit the ground
It doesn't mean we're not still falling,
Oh I want so bad to pick you up
But you're still too reluctant to accept my help
What a shame, I hope you find somewhere to place the blame
But until then the fact remains

Everyday
With every worthless word we get more far away
The distance between us makes you so hard to stay
Nothing lasts forever, but be honest babe
It hurts but it may be the only way

Everyday
With every worthless word we get more far away
The distance between us makes it so hard to stay
But nothing lasts forever, but be honest babe
It hurts but it may be the only way

Isa lang naiisip ko...Mismo.


photo aka: dito na lang muna ko makikipagrelasyon.

Other tracks: BACK AT YOUR DOOR, WON'T GO HOME WITHOUT YOU, NOT FALLING APART, INFATUATION, BETTER THAT WE BREAK... san ka pa? titles pa lang ata nasasaktan na ko eh.

6.03.2007

Paminsan-minsan meron pa din namang mas mura sa P1.

Ang mga araw na lumipas ay sadyang napakabigat para saken... marahil alam mo kung bakit, marahil hindi. Ngunit ang importante don ay sinusubukan ko at pinipilit... ng sobra sobra... na makakalimot at wag nang isipin pa ang malulungkot...

Kaya eto na lang ang isipin naten:

1. Ang mayakap ko ang tatay ko ule... kahit sa panaginip lang. basta ung feeling na un.
2. Ang makasama ang pamilya ko tuwing pasko, bagong taon, at kung ano ano pang okasyon.
3. Ang kiligin... muli.
4. Ang maaliw dahil sa isang tao o dahil sa isang pangako na may taong padating o dadating.
5. Ang makatanggap ng tawag galing sa aking mga pamangkin para lang malaman ko na naalala pa nila ako.
6. Ang feeling na may inaabang abangan ka pa ding tawag o text o im.
7. Ang malaman na sa tuwing nagpupunta ang mga pamangkin ko sa bahay tuwing linggo ay tinatanong pa din nila kung nasan ako.
8. Ang mangkiliti ng bata at mapatawa sila ng todo todo.
9. Ang makapagpatulog ng bata... lalo na ang isang sanggol.
10. Ang makapagpatahan ng umiiyak na bata.
11. Ang makitang bigla na lang magliliwanag ang mukha ng isang bata dahil may natutunan galing sayo.... light bulb thought kumbaga.
12. Ang magkakuha ng kiss n hug galing sa aking mga estudyante araw-araw.
13. Ang malaman na importante ka at hinahanap-hanap pa din... sa buhay ng mga musmos kong estudyante.
14. Ang makabuos ng isang bote ng jose cuervo at mapabagsak sa dulo.
15. Ang malasing at wala nang malay pagkatapos.
16. Ang may malasing o mapatumba ng unang unang beses... lalo na ung sumusuka pa.
17. Ang makatae ng maluwag pagkatapos pigil-pigilin ito ng buong araw na nasa labasan.
18. Ang mahaching... with feelings.
19. Ang mautot nang maluwag sa yo at sa mga tao sa paligid mo.
20. Ang makatulog matapos ang napahabang araw... sa sarili mong kama sa loob ng iyong kwarto.
21. Ang kumain ng ice cream sa napakainit na araw o ang kumain ng ice cream araw-araw.
22. Ang kumain ng lusaw na chocolate.
23. Ang magkaron ng kasama na kumain ng kumain ng walang pakialam sa carbs, calories, at kung ano ano pa.
24. Ang tumawa ng todo todo tos biglang pipigilin at kailangan maging magseryosong mukha... at gagawin ito madalas kasama ang isang malaking grupo ng mga kaibigan.
25. Ang mapasigaw ng AAAAHHHH sa shower na bigla na lang lumamig ang tubig.
26. Ang magbabad sa beach sa ilalim ng napakainit na araw at pagkatapos ay sabay sabay kayong tatakbo sa tubig... at bigla na lang kayong may maririnig na fffsss na parang sabay sabay kayong tina-thaw.
27. Ang magbigay ng butchi na madume sa mga guro na paborito kayo.
28. Ang maglagay ng karatula sa labas ng bintana ng aming classroom para sa mga nagtitinda ng buko at ice cream.
29. Ang manuod ng sine na maingay kayong isang buong row kakasigaw o kakatawa.
30. Ang maglagay ng bubblegum sa kotse ng kaaway ng kaibigan ko.
31. Ang gumamit ng supot sa telopono at sabihing choppy ka at sabay bagsak.
32. Ang magtago sa isang taong kinaasaran mo.
33. Ang manlait ng mga tao na dumadaan sa paningin namin.
34. Ang hindi pag-inom ng inumin na ipinapadala sa table namin ng aking mga kaibigan tapos ay sabay sabay na pagkikilatis sa nagpadala nito at sabay alis. tse!
35. Ang tumawa lang ng buong maghapon... ng malakas.
36. Ang magkwentuhan ng sabay sabay at nagsisigawan kahit wala naman sa lugar na maingay.
37. Ang magcut at manuod ng sine. o kaya umuwi na lang.
38. Ang magdrop ng isang subject at i encash ang refund.
39. Ang maangas na sumakay sa isang family use na jeep at mapahiya pagkatapos.
40. Ang gumimik ng naka pangtulog.
41. Ang maligo... SA ULAN.
42. Ang magkagusto ng todo todo sa isang tao na bandang huli ay mapagsasawaan mo din.
43. Ang humirit, makahirit, at makarinig ng magandang hirit!
44. Ang manuod ng basketball... lalo na kung kilala mo pa ang mga naglalaro at talagang napapasigaw ka pa sa excitement.
45. Ang matulog ng lasing na lasing.

I wish he's forever 7,

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If only all boys could be just like him, then we wouldn't have to look for men, boys wouldve been enough!

Rainer Raphael Leoncio is the first nephew in the family. The eldest boy and therefore! the most kulit, the roughest, the silliest, and the one who got into video games so early!

I can't imagine this nephew of mine growing up cos a) that would just mean I am darn old already, b) he might not be that pa-cute anymore and! c) he might not like playing the cutesy patootsy part anymore!

While I was gone his mom would constantly tell me stories about how he randomly remembers me... and then in the end, the tear-jerker Q and statement: "When is tita just going home? Miss ko na siya eh!"

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He is my nephew who constantly asks in the most innocent way if: a) I'm going back to the US, b) Why do I have to go back to the US; and c) When am i going back to the US. And he was asking me these in between theme parks and sight seeing trips while we were on vaca!

When I made it back here and I was able to talk to him on the phone---
Rain: Tita just? Where are you?
Me: (Kiddingly, jokingly, wishful thinkingly) I'm on the plane... on my way home!
Rain: Really?! He dint even wait for me to answer...
and then he dropped the phone run to his mom screaming, "Mommy! Tita just is going home she said she's on the plane now! She will be here soon!"

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I think they say memories are important because they are lasting snapshots on our minds of the silly events that we want to forever cherish and look back at... Well just in case something happens to me and my memories, here's a little definite reminder that I can look back at... to remind me of how loved I am... specially back at home!

5.28.2007

2 of many reasons why I went home

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photo aka: the men in the family are selling like hotcakes but here's who u have to deal with when ur part of the family!

Kuya Joel got married the following year. Well it's actually after some days but since one was on December and the other on January we think that's two different years. What the heck. For us it's not sukob! And! we're not really a fan of those type of beliefs (except for my mom maybe who every now and then consults a feng shui master, thus explains those gold medalions around the house!).

If Kuya Carlo is the brother who treats me as if I'm forever 16, Kuya Joel is the exact opposite! I could get married at 16 and he wouldn't care less. He'll problie ask me if I'm sure and if I'm happy then that's it. Well ok, maybe that's not exactly true but Kuya Joel for me is a cool brother. Cool as in he lets me be. Cool as in he watches from afar and only makes himself visible if it seems I'm struggling already.

And on his wedding day, he was cool as in C-O-O-L. Like he's done it before. Im kidding! He's been to several weddings before but it was only then that he was the groom. With his 3 children with him, Kuya managed to be a proud dad and an anxious groom.

Kuya Joel met his match in Judith as I think they are both helping each other to stir in the right direction. I know she gave him focus in so many ways. She was that right person when he needed someone.

I'd say the wedding was really a ceremony of union... the union of 2 families and 2 cultures. (Now I'm thinking maybe I heard this from the priest's or the rabbi's message, I'm not sure!). It was also a nice happy day of mingling and REUNIONs. It's like a marriage of family/friendster connections. *wink, wink*

And so cheers to welcoming the new year with new beginnings, and the beauty of family togetherness. *ehem, ehem* And to the bride and groom in their new life as a married couple!

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photo aka: the bride and groom (the 1 looking crazy below the bride) with the whacky fellas from OUR SIDE of the family

1 of many reasons why I went home

Kuya Carling got married!!!

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... and as expected... he cried!

Every family gets together for special functions... and this year, I used this excuse to go home and get off from work. Let's put it this way, it was one of the reasons that calmed me while I was living life away from home. That I HAD TO go home for kuya's wedding!

Everyone knows kuya carlo is my toughest bro if not D TOUGHEST. He's as strict as my dad and looks exactly just like him! He's the only kuya that I am scared of cos a) i think he deliberately wants it that way and b) he's the kuya of all my kuya's... in short it's not just me it's the rest of us in the family! But don't get this wrong, I don't mean being scared of him in a negative way. It's more like respect. I know he's always wanted the best for me and usually he's just protective... maybe sometimes a bit overprotective. But that's just life... that's why he was born before me and I, several years after him. Thus he's the kuya and I am the youngest sister or yeah! the only younger sister!

Kuya Carlo is also the kuya of the family because he stepped up or maybe lived up to the role as soon as dad passed away. It's not a duty that was assigned to him but it was a duty he embraced. As an older bro kuya is strict no doubt. But! he is also a sweet bro. For someone who oftem claims to have the tough guy facade, kuya can also be the emotional one. On a recent beach trip, he texted me - "Wag ka muna papakasal". And this is when I'm on an island with just my gal pals and at some random time on the first week of his married life! Yep, that's kuya. Sometimes I wonder if at times dad sends him some signs to check up on me!

I think kuya met his match with Rette. She's that right balance to his "cool" and tough facades! I know he makes him happy which makes everybody happy! Well she makes me happy because she always backs me up! hahaha.

So this is to my kuya... who totally boohooed on his wedding day... and who on his wedding day, did not need to call superman but actually pulled off a super wedding vow!

We love you kuya!
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photo aka: yes, this is just the groom's IMMEDIATE (semi-complete) family

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=18zSGNe1Pao <------to see carling crying in action!

5.27.2007

Christmas 2006

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photo aka: my only by the xmas tree pic for 2006. AFTER opening my ONLY gift that day!

In the Guevarra household Christmas Eve is D MAIN EVENT. I'd say you never experience christmas unless u experience it with us. It's the day that turns all of us into kids. It's a great tradition that my family has started. You see, for a family as big as ours it's not everyday that we get gifts from our parents. And so for mom and dad it was during xmas that they really spoiled us. It's the day that we really get something from our wish list. And then later on when some of us (or maybe them?) started working the gifts got even better... better cos there were more. If you're off dad's allowance list then that means you're part of the gift giving committee as well. It's not a must but in our family, it always just feels better when you give something back.

Now that is only about the gift giving part! Christmas eve is always special for us because of FOOD. My mom is so used to cooking for all of us that she complains it's so hard for her to downsize the menu when most of my brothers and sisters started moving out of the house. My mom can prepare a FEAST any given day cos that's what she's used to. She's used to feed 12++ on a daily basis. And so what makes christmas merrier, it's our CHRISTMAS EVE FEAST! No matter where we are, at home, at some other part of the country, or in another country, my mom will surely cook and cook and cook A LOT OF FOOD just for us.

Another reason why christmas is special for us is because of our preparations. When we want to travel for the holidays, we'd surely be out before Christmas. For my married siblings it's like this, Christmas Eve at home with us and New Year's with your in-laws or with us too if we're someplace else. Every week my family makes it a point to get together to see each other and also now, for the cousins to have like a playdate together. It's also our family bonding time. When we have our family meetings, when we make special announcements, or when we gossip about each other's lives or other people's business. It's our way to touch-base with one another. And so don't expect we stop doing that because it's the holidays. Heck! Christmas Eve is like the mother of all our sunday family days!

I will always have the fondest memories of christmas. Christmas eve for me is the day that I always, always feel good, whether I've been good or bad! It's that day when I feel the joy of being with family. When I feel how blessed I am to be a part of MY FAMILY! Christmas is always about family and thanksgiving... for us it is about that and many many more.

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photo aka: that's what happens when there's paparazzi cams! BEFORE opening our ONLY gifts for that day!

5.24.2007

Still Wishing at 23.


When I was 1... I was too young too remember but I probably wished for more milk. breast milk!

When I was 7... I knew it was an age that you're supposed to make a fuss of. And maybe I was wishing for a birthday party!

When I was 9... I started having friends at school. And I know I was wishing for someone to attend my party. or atleast my best friend makes it.

When I was 12... I belonged in a circle and had my own set of friends, the first solid barkada. And I was wishing that I'd be able to go out with them for a treat.

When I was 16... Here comes HS and the circle of friends got HUGE. it's the ERA when we started throwing surprises. And I was wishing that my friends think I'm special enough to deserve a surprise too!

When I was 18... I knew there was pressure to make it my "coming out" age. And I was secretely hoping I could celebrate it low-key aka pamper myself aka travel and shopping!

When I was 19... It was when it started to dawn on me that I needed to celebrate my 18th bday. And then I was wishing and hoping if maybe I could still throw a party for my "coming of age"!

When I was 20... I knew it was official. I was no longer a teenager. And I was wishing I dint have to grow old and felt like not celebrating at all!

When I was 21... This then felt more like my 18! And I was wishing that I celebrate it like a frat boy, drunk and wasted!

When I was 22... I admitted to myself I am old and made peace with that. And I was wishing I could just have a good bonding time with friends.

When I turned 23... Away from home for the first time I did feel old and that my birthday felt less special. And more than anything I was wishing that I was home.

Now I am still 23... it's no longer my birthday and here I am wishing again. I am old and suddenly LIFE is happening.

But we're never too old to make wishes. And this year I did not get a birthday cake with my birthday wish but recently I did get a W.I.S.H. candle. And here's for friendship and wishes... let our candle vigils start.


photo aka: magical wish candle or maybe genie in the bottle?